Outline and quick draft of an RPG story line

Mao Rune

  • Posts: 17

Sadly, I do most of my drafting on paper so I can articulate and image with my own drawings. So here I'm gonna type up a basic outline and draft of my concept for a story line I'd like to play out in a hack 'n' slash RPG!
If this sounds interesting to anyone that is looking to form up a team for such a game, let me know. Also all criticizing is welcome, just play nice.

I'll try to keep this as basic as possible. Keep in mind I've got entire countries, characters, etc. already listed in my notes, but I'll keep them out of here for the sake of simplicity.

Also be mindful that my inspiration for a mobile RPG comes from the Zenonia series.

The Great Tale
The story is told by two people, a prince and a peddler. They are one in the same, living in two different worlds.

The prince lives in a kingdom where they believe in a religion worshiping a Goddess that granted their kingdom reign over the lands. The blessing of power and guidance from the Goddess is passed down to each rising king in his inauguration by the responsibility of taking care of the rose of the Goddess. Pretty simple and easy, right? Not. It is a responsibility because the rose’s power is locked away; contained, and should not ever be released for the fear of one being controlling power equal to the Goddess herself.

When the prince is just in his early adult years, war breaks out; the neighboring and enemy country is attacking with full force for the control of all the lands. The king being the brave leader he is leads his army to battle. The first play is initiated as the prince fights along side his father and king.

Here, conceptually, is where gameplay begins. Fighting as the prince for a simple “get-used-to” control guide and some hack ‘n’ slash fun.
As the play rolls on, the king falls in battle. ;__; I know. Scenes pan as the battle dies out and the king is brought back to the castle for preparations. Tomorrow, the prince will become king of his fathers beloved land and; as tradition is said, he will be given the Goddess’s rose.

Little be it known that it was the queen who scandalized and brought about the beginning of this war, making dealings with the enemy kingdom. Her plans are to take the rose for herself along with the powers that it holds. With the aid of a clan of mages, she believes to know the secret to unlocking it’s power.

So, after the death of her “lover” and king, the queen begins plotting the murder of her own son. With all the possible beholders out of her way, she will take the rose for herself.

In an intense struggle between the prince and the mages of the queen, the prince nearly falls. It is then that the Goddess shows herself to the prince and queen. The Goddess grants the prince one extra spark of strength and courage to defeat his contenders to his avail, but not the death of the queen before she was able to escape.
Completely fatigued and beaten down, the prince collapses and before he completely gives out, the Goddess slips into his heart to keep him alive, but not awake. His sleep contains her power still yet within him.

The queen releases what has happened and orders her remaining clan mages to take him under research and try finding a way to remove the Goddess from his body.

Stopped reading yet? I hope not.

Now is where we meet the peddler. As I said in the beginning: the prince and peddler are one in the same. The poor boy we now meet is the prince himself in an alternate universe of his dreams. The Goddess has created a completely new world for him to live in including memories of family and friends. The prince (in peddler person) has no idea of who he really is in the real world or what has happened.

The peddler’s dream is to aspire to be a knight. His friends and mother are very supportive though sometimes tease him about how small he is. But they all know he’s a prodigy. Total knight material, babe.

The story (in which most of the game is actually played) of the peddler begins with his final test in knight school. His last and admission determining test is a quest to race against other knights-in-training and find an item located on a given map and return it to the teacher. The quest involves trekking many terrains and fighting monsters and bandits.

After the completion of the final test (in which, of course, the peddler passes) he is knighted and fitted up. Tomorrow will begin our first knightly duties and “fun”.

As far as game play is concerned, there’s really no story progression that happens here. Pretty basic nit-pick quests to gain exp and currency.

After all the BS-in’ is done, the peddler now made knight is invited to partake in a small adventure of sorts to escort a caravan of sorts to a neighboring city. The caravan is a front to any bandits, as the real escort takes place elsewhere to transport his kingdoms princess. Oh boy, a princess!? Yeah, really.

Well the plan doesn’t work! Bandits find and attack the correct caravan and the peddler-knight is called to duty to protect the princess! Being newbie and all, the struggle is hard where most knights are killed save for the peddler-knight, another young newbie knight, and the princess who is captured!

Back home the peddler-knight and his new friend are suspended for their failure to protect the princess and now “adults” are to take care of the matter while these two nit-pick little jobs to teach them their lesson. Well, that’s just bogus says the two newbs! They decide to venture out on their own to save the princess and reclaim their titles and respect.

All of this is an illusion adventure created by the Goddess (hopefully you didn’t forget about her) who disguised herself as the princess. In the end she did all of this to train and teach the young prince in his mind and spirit how a long journey can build him up and learn to control power and be a rightful and good king.

After the long adventure full of twists and turns that are too much to mention here, the princess is rescued and reveals herself to the peddler-knight / prince as the Goddess and awakens him in the real world, ready to wield the power of the Goddess to destroy the enemy and end the war against his kingdom he now reigns over.

The (basic) End.

The Game
In my drafts and notes I have concept drawings of all the characters, towns, world map, etc.
I also have a basic HUD concept, as well. Plenty of room for more ideas from team mates that would love to make this game happen for iPhone and Android. :)

SO, whatcha all think?

« Last Edit: February 02, 2012, 07:54:34 am by Mao Rune »


  • Posts: 160
*CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP Clap clap clap* Hm, weird. The more someone types "clap", they wonder if it's spelled right... ???
How can you be enjoyed when you are an immature annoyance in at least ONE way?

Mao Rune

  • Posts: 17
So you like it then? lol


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  • Posts: 9470
Wow that's quite a good story you have there.  I'd ask to help on the game but I don't have plans to buy the iStencyl pro license anytime soon.


  • Posts: 160
How can you be enjoyed when you are an immature annoyance in at least ONE way?

Mao Rune

  • Posts: 17
So you like it then? lol

Yes, yes I do.
thanks man. If you're interested, lemme know.

Same for you, Rob. If you change your mind let me know.

If anybody else is interested in teaming up and talking ideas just hit me up. My buddy from another forum said he might be interested in spriting, but thats still up in the air so if there's someone else interested in spiritng we can still talk. :)

Later I'll try taking pictures of my sketches. I don't have a scanner. :(


  • Posts: 13
Nice story you've got there. I would help, but I have several ongoing projects right now. Maybe I'll help after I get more experience in spriting or coding.
Need a level done for a project? Ask here: http://community.stencyl.com/index.php/topic,8255.0.html


  • Posts: 11
The story is good, basically.
Still, a little bit stereotypical, isn`t it?

It`s like bad people (queen) versus good people (prince) who grows (peddler) and is accompanied by a silly sidekick (the newbie-knight. The "silly" is only speculation, but he didn`t seem to be a very strong character)

- the peddler could have visions regarding his former life as prince, thinking he would went insane and struggling on his quest
- some way he could learn more about his parents in the real world (rifts in the dream world maybe?), finding out his father was a tyrant, and at the end leaving the possibility to either leave his mother alive or kill her.
- the goddess hasn`t much screen time, maybe books you can find ingame about the theology of this world?

A quite big idea which would change the entire story:
No dream world, instead the goddess created a new body. This would leave the choice to either get back in his old body (living the easy life of the prince) or stay in the new one (for living a life of adventure and being with his new friends)
This would also make the queen as arch enemy more present.
The visions and struggling could stay.

If you don`t want ends to choose, take the "new body"-thing. This would leave room for a sequel there another god could obtain his old body.
I apologize for my bad English, I´m still learning it.